Archive | February 2014

SSSSSSSMOKING

When I was a little girl, growing up in the beautiful planes of Kenya. They  do say home is where the heart is and even as I am miles away Kenya will always be a home to me and right now I miss its sunshine and the food – am salivating just by the thought of it. Anyway I went to school in a fishy named institution and every Friday we would have these inspirational talks to help us make better decisions according to them. The topics would range from sex education, drug abuse, how to carry yourself as a lady, manners and so on. One talk that I will never forget is on SMOKING.

It is not that the speaker made an impeccable speech or anything, actually it is quite the opposite. He wasn’t eloquent by a long shot. He had trouble pronouncing almost each and very word owing to his mother tongue effect and boy did we find that amusing. We would laugh so heartily- beauty  and perks of being young and care free. He had this weird mix and match suit that was always too wrinkled, his trousers never touched his ankles, he always wore socks that were of different colours and one was always longer than the other. His hair was always combed backwards but you could clearly see the struggle he had gone through to make that possible.

In his hands he always carried a poster, smoking-logothis poster.

Well, I don’t know about you but this just did it for me. Every time I thought of smoking, this picture would literally pop into my mind and just as fast as I had picked the cigarette I would drop it and practically close my eyes willing the picture of that mutilated being to go away. You can imagine me, wrapped like a ball in a corner, eyes closed “go away, please go away”, I would earnestly  beg.

Maybe that scruffy man did me a favour or maybe I should sue him for the torment this picture has been putting me trough all these years. A friend of mine called Mike told me that smoking makes one look sexy and that a woman holding a cigarette looks feisty…now who wouldn’t want to send all those signals to the one they like and even passer – bys just because they can?

I know I would but Mike,  we will never find out because that picture, that picture is like my sponsor haha.

OF FRIENDS AND BLOGGING

What use are friends if they cannot support your endeavors? When growing up, am sure my father not only wanted a son but he also wanted me to be an engineer or a doctor. You can imagine his shock and utter disappointment when all he got was a struggling writer.He completely pretends am something else and my mother, well my mother always thinks whatever I write is either plagiarized or borrowed because she doesn’t believe that I can actually be creative. What with my clumsiness, laziness, forgetfulness, never willing to do house chores or even course works until the last minute (I believe her list is much longer) – how can creativity come from such a being? She keeps wondering.          images (9)  

The people who know me better – read my friends, don’t care or rather they are too busy reading gossip blogs as they want to keep up with whatever it is the #Kardashian family is up to. Sometimes am glad they don’t read my blog because that gives me a chance to talk about them like I am doing right now but what is the use of bad mouthing someone if they cannot hear or read your ranting?

That takes all the fun out of it so today I am going to make sure they all know how I feel about their sadistic selves. As my friend you should make a point of even reminding me that I need to update my blog because you have missed my lovely posts. You should be the first to post on my posts no matter how silly you think my point of view may be. After reading them posts you should immediately share them to all your other friends – even the ones I don’t like – and let them know how talented I am, of course you should mention that they need to share their newly acquired knowledge from yours truly to their friends’ friends.untitledh

I know, it sure sucks to be my friend but that is not even the bad news. The bad news is that you are stuck with me and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.

BEEN IN LOVE YET?

Have you ever been in love? Have you ever felt like nothing else mattered anyway? Have you ever  felt your heart swell so much with happiness you could feel like you were floating as your feet become lighter and lighter?

Being in love is the best feeling one can ever feel. It is better than orgasm (S) during sex, better than the high of doing drugs, better than the adrenaline rush one gets while driving a sports car at high speed or riding a rollercoaster and even better than the feeling you get when holding a new pair of  #louboutin shoes! When in love the world seems like a better place, no more pain, no more heartbreaks, no more disappointments, no more hunger, no more sickness, no more terrorism, no more unrests like what’s being experienced in Ukraine, a better world for us and our children’s’ children.

When you embrace that one person who not only means the world to you but is also your world, it is like you are the only ones present in that moment. You close your eyes so hard willing for that moment to last a little bit longer. “Just one more minute”, you whisper. One more teeny tiny minute to feel their skin against yours, one more minute to smell their alluring sexy odour on you,  one more minute to taste the strawberry on their lusty chewable lips, one more minute to feel them way deep in your insides until your legs tremble with pleasure, one more minute just one more minute to feel alive.

The problem is that you might end up losing yourself in them but still the look in their eyes when they see you is worth it. Knowing that someone loves you immensely and is terrified of losing you is a pretty scary feeling and you tiptoe around afraid of breaking their heart but go on take a leap of faith – fall in love.

FRIENDS / LOVERS?

Do you want us to be just friends or would you like to be in a relationship with me? That is a question I have been fighting  with. Not because I don’t know what I want but because as much as it sounds lovely I don’t want to go back to what we had. It was good while it lasted but I sincerely don’t have the energy anymore. No energy to fight you, no energy to worry if you still care or not, no energy to wonder if you are being faithful or not but most of all, no energy to downplay my needs.

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I loved you, I loved you with all I am and every time I reminisce about it a tear escapes my eyes. Not a tear of regret but one of happiness because we had some pretty good times too. I can still remember the first time I saw you. How could a man be so beautiful?

I fell in love with you even before we talked. Call me crazy but it was the best feeling ever and once I finally got to know you I was more than content but sadly I guess love is never enough. Sometime I used to wonder if its what I did or what I didn’t do but I know I did my best – maybe my best wasn’t good enough for you. I am sorry you didn’t find all I gave satisfactory, I am sorry I couldn’t make you happy, I am really sorry I gave up on us.

But that’s just it. I gave up. I gave up because I couldn’t wait any longer. I gave up because I was done hurting. I gave up because there was nothing to fight for anymore and since you will never change and I will never change, me coming back will be a cycle – one that may kill both of us. So, friends / lovers? Am sure you already know my answer.

ONLINE DATING

•Online dating sites
•Group 4
•Introduction

 Remember back in the day when relationships were mysterious and there was a thrill in meeting and getting to know new people? Well sadly online dating threw all that away.

The internet’s advent has partly displaced not only family and school, but also neighbourhood, friends and the workplace as venues for meeting partners.

Yes we still meet partners through the conventional way but we always run an online check on them more often than not.

 

•DEFINITION OF TERMS
•Disruptive medium –  New technology that unexpectedly displaces/interrupts an established technology. It can also mean an event that results in a displacement or discontinuity.
•Online dating sites – Sites that allow individuals to contact and communicate with one another over the Internet.
•Open Media – Positive and innovative engagements with new media technologies and new media and cultural forms and relationships, ‘open’ in the sense that it adopts a collaborative ethos and makes use of ‘freemium’ meaning the service is offered free but premium is charged for better features.
Popular examples
JDate, Gay.com, Christian Mingle, Ok.Cupid
•Interpersonal Deception Theory
•In this theory, Buller and Burgoon define deception as occurring “when communicators control the information contained in their messages to convey a meaning that departs from the truth as they know it” (205).
•Pros of Online Dating

 

•Online dating sites offer access to way more potential suitors than conventional dating methods.
•One is able to go through the potential suitors’ profiles and learn things about them beforehand. This may be a good thing as some people find the art of trying to know their significant others’ likes and dislikes tiresome but most of the time the information is far from true as the internet is full of narcissistic selves and more often than not its is a gateway for sex offenders, rapists name them.
•Online dating keeps one from having to go through being humiliated or rejected.
•Many people lead busy lives and they don’t have the time to go out and mingle so as to meet potential suitors so online dating sites come in handy to them.

 

•Cons of Online Dating
•Browsing through and comparing  profiles of potential suitors may lead to commoditization and may thus result in unwillingness to commit to any one person.
•There is nothing like online private policies therefore all the information one gives on this dating sites no matter how private you deem it to be is public record.
•One ends up having too much expectations from the potential suitor (S) and this may lead to disappointments.
 
Relevant TED Talks
•http://ed.ted.com/lessons/inside-okcupid-the-math-of-online-dating-christian-rudder
 
•REFERENCES
•http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coventry University_Department_of_Media#Open_media
•Buller, D. B., and Burgoon, J.K (1996) “Interpersonal Deception Theory.” Communication Theory (10503293) 6.3 : 203-242.

VALENTINES DAY

The day just didn’t seem right

I felt lonely and alone

I looked at the flowers I had bought for you

And a smile escaped my lips

 

I had it all planned

A nice quiet lunch reservation

Some wine and a lovely late night walk

But I guess I missed a spot

betrayal

betrayal

 

The clock ticked seconds into minutes

Minutes to hours

And still no word from you

The beautiful red petals started withering

The reservation cancelled due to demand

The mouth watering white chocolate

Melted due to the high temperatures

 

Dressed to kill as they say

In a short red dress with stilettos

And my hair down because you like it that way

I looked forward to seeing you

 

I got worried wondering where you could be

I wanted to try at the police station but that’s too dramatic

Or at the mortuary but that’s too pessimistic

I ran helter skelter my heart thumping with fear

 

I prayed for as long as I can remember

Begging God to spare your life

Even long enough for me to tell you how much I loved you

True life isn’t fair

But surely heaven could wait just one more night

 

As I ran towards your house

I focused on the good times we had

And the thought of being in your arms pushed me on

I opened the door and headed straight for the bedroom

And there you were in another woman’s arms.